DALMATIAN SPOTS

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED BY THE SOMERS RECORD (06-18-26)

 

     If you were unable to travel this year, allow me to be your guide along the Dalmatian coast, and on to Venice. Our journey began in Split, Croatia, which, while settled in the second or third century, BC, became a future tourist destination with the construction of the palace of Roman emperor Diocletian in 305, AD. It was essentially his retirement home, where he spent his final days raising cabbages, which luckily you don't have to raise very far. Diocletian, while extremely innovative in areas of taxation and governmental structure, had clearly overestimated the importance of coleslaw.

     Diocletian was established as emperor, possibly by poisoning his predecessor, at a time when it seemed like whoever had the most effective poison qualified themselves to lead an empire. That's why, if I was king at my meeting of the inner court, I would pull the old switcheroo when no one was watching. "HARK! Is that NOT Brad Pitteth?" And when everybody turns to see I switch all the wine glasses. There was a lot of back-stabbing going on. By the way, no one ever seems to complain about being front-stabbed. "Whom (I picture ancient kings having a better grasp of the correct grammatical usage of the word 'whom' than they probably did) I THOUGHT was my best friend tried to stab me in the FRONT. I suppose I had it coming."

     After Diocletian's death the place was passed around like my Mom's meatloaf, and everyone had a little taste. The Byzantines, the Venetians, the French and the Austrians all had a split of Split before its eventual secession from Yugoslavia as part of Croatia. Now the city is conquered routinely by bridal parties.

     You can stroll for free through much of the well-preserved remains of the walled palace, added to by subsequent regimes. Saint Dominus Cathedral was built later, as was its bell tower, which you can scale and wonder, as I did, if the Romans EVER ran out of steps. The Peoples' Square is a famous nexus, and we asked a couple American-sounding youngsters if we were headed there, the direction they just came from. "Were there people there?" we asked. "Yes." "Were they square?" "Some were." That was good enough for us.

     The Riva is a promenade by the waterfront long enough for a good stroll, amble or saunter, depending on your mood. A wide choice of open air restaurants make it easy to get a meal or a cocktail, or take in the sunset and watch the world go by. This is the place to see or be seen, so you might find whoever's looking for you, unless they see you first.

     Our time over, we did just what you would expect, and split. A passenger ferry cruises to the other islands and then down the sea to Dubrovnik, another Croatian city rich in history. Its fortunes as a tourist destination increased dramatically after the HBO hit "Game of Thrones" filmed extensively there. 

     The southern section of Dubrovnik, known as "Old Town," is ensconced in a fortress of thick ramparts over a mile and a quarter long. Started in the 13th century, it took four hundred years to complete the walls, as they might have been waiting for Mexico to pay for them. A tourist must-do is to scale the steps and circumnavigate the entirety of the walls, enjoying the stunning views of the Adriatic, the northern city and the bustling town below. You should note that the exercise includes 1,080 steps, so if you are in a 12-step program, you could relapse 90 times and still be cured.

     Below, Old Town's main road, Stradun, was laid from east to west, so that the winds gusting from the mountains in the north would not disrupt even a good game of solitaire. Restaurants, shops and bars line the narrow streets and alleys in this pedestrian-only charming enclave.

     The gates to the city included an antechamber where, announcing your business and identifying yourself, guards situated on the top of the wall could evaluate your immediate usefulness and deal with you accordingly. It was like when my Dad made us answer the phone to see if it was "The Guy from the Church," who presumably was canvassing for donations on the very day that my Dad was "Not Home."

     Since we were not staying in Old Town, as many do, we were brave enough to make the trip on city streets by eBike. In this case, "brave" is also synonymous with "stupid." However, our hotel north of Old Town in the Guza waterfront area was a good starting point to explore other areas such as the newer Lapad district, with its pedestrian mall of cafés and restaurants. 

     A stay in Dubrovnik would not be complete without a visit to the Blue Cave, so named because of the color I turned when I jumped into the "refreshing" waters of the Adriatic for the short swim into the grotto. "You'll get used to it," the guide said, meaning never having any feeling in my extremities. After the spelunking and dunking, a trip to a warm expanse of Croatian beach was just what the doctor ordered, especially with medication that included an umbrella swizzle stick.
     Next time, the romantic vistas of Venice....