THE BLUE DANUBE, PART II

ORIGINALLY PUBLISHED BY THE SOMERS RECORD (06-16-22)- Please remember small business in your town during this coronavirus pandemic

The blue Danube, Part II
     Our next stop along the Danube River was Vienna, rich in culture, history, architecture and well, richness. Known as the "City of Music" or the "City of Dreams," it was home to many cultural movements and the people who furthered them, artistically, musically, politically and scientifically. The exchange of ideas took place often over an Einspänner coffee in the famous cafes that dot the Inner Ring. We went to one, and I was just about to pen an intellectual treatise when dessert came and I got distracted.
     When I first heard the words "Wiener Schnitzel," I just assumed it was a breed of dog, but when people told me how great it tasted, I realized that I had a lot to learn about continental cuisine. "Wien" means "Vienna" in German, so anything Wiener means anything Viennese. "Schnitzel" means "meat" so the schnitzeler the better, as far as I'm concerned.
     As we walked around the impressive St. Stephen's Cathedral and the majestic Hofburg, our tour guide assured us she was going to tell us the REAL story of Vienna, not what you heard in "The Sound of Music." I guess that means that the hills were not really alive, it was just movie trickery.
     There is a big statue of Mozart in the Burggarten park that is a popular tourist attraction. In spite of the fact that he died here at the young age of 35, his more than 800 works of all types make him one of the most prolific and revered artists in the history of music. It inspired me to get going and compose a few hundred works, and if they ever decide to erect a statue in my honor, my biggest fear is that they'll come to their senses and abandon the project before it is fully erect.
     At the Albertina Museum we took in works from various modern movements as represented by artists from Monet to Picasso. I think my favorites were Monet and Paul Signac, who made quite an impression on me, but I should have expected that. There are always a few paintings that look like they were created by pouring ketchup onto a plate of pureed vegetables, and they hang them up there just to make me wonder what it was like to go to dinner with one of these guys.
     At night we attended a small concert of Mozart and Johann Strauss Jr.'s greatest hits, and it was a pleasure to hear them with the instruments unmiked, as they originally sounded. A story is told that women were so enamored of the handsome Strauss' hair that they demanded locks of it as a keepsake. Once he had too little hair to part with he enlisted the help of a poodle, and the swatches were so popular that he ran out of poodle before he ran out of canoodle.
     As we sailed on, I was looking forward to arriving in Budapest, because it takes the pressure off me if a place's name already has the word "pest" in it. The city was populated by Celtics, became part of the Roman Empire, was taken over by the Hungarians, pillaged by the Mongols, and when the Ottomans took over in 1525, everyone figured they could put their feet up and relax, but that was not the case. When we arrived, the townspeople saw the word "Viking" written right on the boat and they looked absolutely crestfallen, thinking they were going to get sacked again. But we came in peace, if you don't include me.
     The cities of Buda and Pest were united in 1873, although they had been giving each other goo-goo eyes across the river for so many years that it became embarrassing. It's a lovely place that marries old-world charm with innovation and technology. The view from Fisherman's Bastion on Castle Hill on the Buda side is a wide panorama of the Danube as it rushes past the Pest side. The splendid Buda Castle guards the city, and the Matthias Church dates back to the 14th century.
     The fact that world cities like Budapest were around for centuries while America was still in diapers should tell you how much we have to learn about how fleeting power can be, and how one's position in the world is something not to be taken lightly and never to be taken for granted. Once you exit the world stage the vacuum will be quickly filled, and if you want to get a glimpse of what that will look like, try emptying your vacuum bag and see for yourself.